Valentines Day

The thing about our married bosses is

most of them don't cheat on their wives.

Most of them don't.

But the ones that do

will find girls like us.

It always starts at the bar.

He will whisper disgusting things your ear,

while pressing his arm around your waist,

just to hear you exhale.

He will get you away from the group,

with just the pull of an elbow. 

And before you know it you're upstairs

and there's music and he's looking at you.

And everything is about your hips here girl.

But less is more, 

trust me 

I learned that the embarrassing way.

You know what I mean.

He'll give you his drink tokens and 

his credit card. He'll let you spend his son's

back to school money 

if it means he gets to be the hero who rescues you 

from yourself at the end of the night.

You'll fall asleep in his arms on the way home,

He'll make sure that happens, like you're not falling for him 

and making a home for yourself there.

I know, I don't get it either.

But the best part is, 

after breakfast the next morning, 

you'll have to wait around in the Cracker Barrel gift shop 

while he buys a Valentines Day gift 

for his wife.

It's all harmless really. 

That's the thing about humans, there really are no rules.

People will treat their loved ones however the fuck they want.

You just have to know what game you're playing.

I'm the other girl,

and sorry doll,

but love isn't real,

trust me

he tells me.